book learnin’

i have just been to two days’ worth of seminars! (well, 1.8 days…i missed the last discussion on both days. also, 1.8 [i learned] is the average print run of those print-on-demand vendors like and so on.)

there was much to take in but i will tell you this instead: there were tasty sandwiches and cookies both days. the other exciting bit was i met an internet person in real life! julie from seen reading was at the booknet day and we now know each other virtually and actually. the downside is i’ve ruined my chances of ever being seen reading. balls!

i forgot to tell y’alls about the awesome/weird email marketing thing i got:

From: RawShark Texts
Date: Mar 19, 2007 5:22 PM
Subject: Crissy: First things first, stay calm.
To: crissy


First things first, stay calm.

If you are reading this, I’m not around anymore. Take the phone and dial 416-619-5469. Tell the woman who answers that you are Crissy [Calhoun]. The woman is Dr. Randle. She’ll understand what has happened and you will be able to see her straight away. Take the car keys and drive the yellow jeep to Dr. Randle’s house. If you haven’t found it yet, there’s a map in the envelope-it isn’t too far and it’s not hard to find.

Dr. Randle will be able to answer all your questions. It’s very important that you go straight away. Do not pass go. Do not explore. Do not collect two hundred pounds.

The house keys are hanging from a nail on the banister at the bottom of the stairs, don’t forget them.

With regret and also hope,

The First Crissy [Calhoun]

Go ahead and call the number. You will hear that I am batshit crazy. (I got this email the day after seeing the craptastic movie Premonition. You know, about a woman losing her mind. So good timing. I was feeling very dissociative on Monday.)

Some googling revealed I am not crazy. But now I am compelled to read the book. Well done marketers.

In other reading list news, I flipped thru Anansi’s spring catalogue and have to read The Deserter’s Tale, reviewed by Nathan Whitlock here.

On the other side of the importance spectrum, let’s all remember the best moments from last night’s america’s next top model, when the girls had to slink through a “crazy laser maze” while posing for Bobby Ninja, a Vogueing expert, who would say “correct” each time a girl hit a pose and who awarded the best poser with a $40,000 diamond bracelet.

One thought on “book learnin’

  1. 1. If it increases your chances of being “seen” I will promptly forget I ever met you. ;)2. I got the same email and it scared the bejesus out of me until I, too, did some Googling. After I sopped up the puddle under my chair. (And I really dislike sharks, so that didn’t help none…)3. Have you heard that crazy crap about the police hunting down Joshua Key?! I got a chance to meet the guy and, man, you just can’t say you’ve had it hard until you see the smile he carries and what it masks. 4. That’s all. Peace, yo!5. Oh. I’m sending the letters this weekend! (I’ve been trying to find appropriate stationary. It’s hard!)

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